Simple Steps to Making Friends (Even if it feels awkward at first)

Simple Steps to Making Friends (Even If It Feels Awkward at First)

Making friends can feel exciting—but also kind of scary. Whether you’re starting a new school year, joining a club, or just hoping to find your people, you might be wondering: How do I actually make friends?

Here’s the truth: most people are waiting for someone else to make the first move. And even if they seem super confident, chances are they feel nervous too. So if you’re feeling unsure, you're not alone—and you’re definitely not doing it wrong.

The good news? Friendship isn’t about being popular or having the perfect personality. It’s about connection, kindness, and a little bit of courage.

Here are some simple steps to help you make friends:

1. Start small
Say hi to someone in class. Compliment their shoes. Ask what they thought of the homework. You don’t need to have a deep conversation right away—friendship often begins with tiny, everyday interactions. Remember: no big deal!

2. Be curious
People like to feel seen. Ask questions like, “What music are you into?” or “What do you think of this teacher?” Listen closely, and share a bit about yourself, too. Friendships grow when both people feel heard.

3. Look for common interests
Whether it’s video games, art, sports, or books, shared hobbies are a great way to connect. Join a club, sign up for something that interests you, or talk to people who seem to enjoy the same things you do.

4. Be patient
Friendships don’t always form instantly. Some take time. Keep showing up, being kind, and staying open. The right connections will come.

And most importantly, remember that the other person is likely nervous about making friends also!

And here’s where self-compassion matters:

Trying to make friends can feel awkward. You might overthink things or feel rejected. That’s normal. Instead of being hard on yourself, try saying:
“Making friends is hard sometimes, and it’s okay to feel unsure. I’m doing my best.”