Dealing with Bullying

Bullying hurts. Whether it’s mean comments online, exclusion at school, or teasing in the hallway, those moments can make you feel small, embarrassed, or like something is wrong with you. One powerful tool that helps more than toughness or pretending it doesn’t bother you is self-compassion — treating yourself with the same kindness you’d give a friend.

What is self-compassion? It’s noticing you’re in pain, acknowledging it without judgment, and responding with understanding and care. Instead of thinking, “I’m so weak,” try, “This is really hard. Anyone would feel upset.” That small shift changes how your brain reacts to stress.

Why it helps with bullying:

• Lowers shame: Shame makes you want to hide. Self-compassion lets you accept your feelings without believing you’re broken. When shame loosens, you’re less likely to blame yourself or try unhealthy coping.

• Builds resilience: Kind self-talk calms your nervous system. That makes it easier to think clearly, set boundaries, or seek help from friends, teachers, or family.

• Prevents escalation: Responding from a place of calm reduces impulsive reactions (like aggressive responses or withdrawing completely) that can make bullying worse.

• Encourages support-seeking: When you treat yourself kindly, it’s easier to reach out. You’ll remember you deserve help and protection.

How to practice it:

• Name the feeling: “I’m feeling hurt and embarrassed.”

• Offer kindness: Put a hand over your heart and say, “This is painful. I care about myself.”

• Remember you’re not alone: “Lots of people go through this. It’s not just me.”

• Take one helpful and SUPER IMPORTANT step: Tell a trusted person, block/report online, or walk away to safety.

Self-compassion doesn’t excuse the bully — it empowers you. Practicing it helps you stay grounded, make smart choices, and protect your mental health while you get through this. You deserve kindness, especially from yourself.